Food is NOT the Root Cause of Overeating
Disordered eating habits rarely have to do with food.
Yup, you read that right. Whether we’re talking about emotional eating, binge eating, chronic restriction, or any other traits of disordered eating...the problem seldom lies with food.
Which means trying to use a food-focused solution (ahem, diet) for a non-food problem is guaranteed to fail.
In other words, if you start a diet while battling emotional eating tendencies, whether you’re following a meal plan or keto or intermittent fasting or macro counting or any of the countless others, you are not addressing the root cause of your problem.
What’s worse, these diets typically exacerbate unhealthy relationships with food.
I saw this downward spiral time and time again during my time as a nutrition coach, which is a huge part of why I quit my position as a “macro counting” coach in order to focus on helping people heal their food relationships and body image using the powers of mindset and mindfulness.
So, if food isn’t at the root of your overeating issue, then what is?
Disconnection.
There are two important forms of disconnection I believe lead to overeating:
1. Disconnection from others
2. Disconnection from yourself (self-disconnection)
By disconnection from others, I mean lacking social support or a sense of belonging which can lead to feeling lonely, isolated, rejected, lost or alone.
Self-disconnection means being out of touch with your feelings, thoughts, expectations, or beliefs. When you’re disconnected from yourself, you’re unable (or unwilling) to hear your own emotional, spiritual, or physical needs, and thus unable to fulfill them.
Self-disconnection is not widely discussed in the dieting world, which is exactly why I’m sharing this with you today.
Here’s an example of self-disconnection and why it’s so important to getting the results you want:
Many people are uncomfortable with feeling any kind of negative emotion, which we try to escape using food (or alcohol, drugs, shopping, social media, etc.).
We’re using food to fill our unmet needs that have nothing to do with food. Thus, we’re overeating to stuff a bottomless void and simultaneously ignoring the deeper issues at play.
We’re not listening to the messengers who are telling us we’re not okay. Who are these messengers?
Our emotions.
When we escape our emotions, we’re not only further disconnecting from our bodies, we’re also continuing to sweep our underlying problems under the rug.
Many people in our current society have become so disconnected from themselves they’re unfamiliar with what their natural hunger signals feel like.
And rather than paying attention to their physiological needs, they’re eating for emotional reasons, or because they’re following a diet that tells them “eat this, not that, and only this much.”
Sounds fun and healthy, right?
Riiiiiiight… But that’s the current norm, sadly.
When we’re not fulfilling our basic needs, like those for connection and meaning, it’s natural that people are both looking to escape and out of touch with their own bodies, emotionally and physically.
That’s why even though I still help individuals lose weight, I focus on teaching my students how to reconnect with themselves and their bodies, so they can cultivate a healthy relationship with food—which in turn makes weight loss so much easier and more sustainable.
Meaning, I help my students shift their focus from their body fat to their self-worth, feel at home in their bodies, and not only make peace with, but enjoy food and exercise.
Trying to force yourself to follow an arbitrary, external set of rules, even if the program advertises itself as “habit change” or “not a diet, a lifestyle!” will never be sustainable unless you address the root causes of why you’re overeating in the first place.
Because the problem is not with food; the problem is with disconnection.
If you’re struggling with your relationship with food but have yet to address the deeper issues at play, you can apply for Food Body Self coaching: a personalized approach to help you feel at home in your body, and not only make peace with, but enjoy food and exercise.
This blog is Part 1 of a 3-part series on The Age of Connection.
For Part 2, click here: How the Age of Disconnection is Destroying our Communities and Health
For Part 3, click here: Do You NEED to Track Your Food?