Why Diets Fail To Give You Control Over Food
How many food rules have your past diets induced you to adopt in order to achieve your goals? Rules like:
“Don’t eat this; do eat that.”
“Don’t eat at this time; eat at that time.”
“Eat this much protein; consume this number of carbs.”
Look closely at any of the top diets on page one of Google, and you’ll see each has some form of law, ruling, or regulation forming the foundation of their eating protocol—along with seductive promises of how your body shape and/or health will improve if you adhere precisely.
Unfortunately there’s a BIG problem with strict, rule-driven eating practices:
If individuals are bound to a host of commands that limit, deprive, and corner them into a “good/bad,” “clean/dirty,” “on-plan/off-plan” mentality…they’re more likely to experience higher occurrences of problematic eating behaviors like binge eating.
Numerous studies have found that inflexible dieting methods predict increased bodyweight, calorie intake, and a loss of control, in both men and women [1]. And one study described rigid diet rules as the “…number one psychological predictor of weight loss failure [2].”
It’s why ‘low carb’, ‘ketogenic’, or ‘intermittent fasting’ diets seldom work in the long run. Not because they don’t create an energy deficit (essential for weight loss to occur) but because they’re too rigid.
Simply put, people can’t keep up with the stringent standards they’ve decided to follow.
How can you overcome this familiar problem then, and gain a sense of control over your eating habits?
The Downsides of Rigid Dieting
Some studies have defined rigid control as:
“An all-or-nothing approach to eating characterized by the avoidance of calorie-dense foods (and if these foods are consumed, overeating and guilt may follow), regimented calorie counting, and fasting.” [3]
It’s why people can never cut out chocolate for longer than a few weeks or why they can only manage to avoid alcohol for an evening before they’re back to square one on a Monday morning.
When a budding dieter steps outside the confines of the rules they’ve set themselves, the subsequent overconsumption is accompanied by feelings of guilt and shame. It’s the eating of carbs when they’re not “supposed to,” or consuming food outside of a specified time window when it’s “forbidden” that sets off a chain reaction.
Guilt over breaking the self-imposed rules then drives further restriction. Because they still can’t adhere to the strict guidelines they’ve imposed upon themselves, the cycle, inevitably, starts again.
Additionally, rigid restraint permits little to no variation of food choices and has been associated with higher levels of unplanned, compulsive eating.
If you engage in eating behaviors that continually send you into a tailspin, hindering you more than they help, then your eating approach is too rigid.
The fixation with what you can and can’t do—specifically with what you can or can’t consume—leads to feelings of failure.
Start searching for any rules you adhere to when attempting to lose weight.
Some may be obvious; some may be hidden. If you’re tempted to “cut out” an item or adhere to a specific target, or even feel consumed by guilt when eating or drinking something, you’re following a diet rule.
While, of course, individual differences matter—not everyone struggles with the same rules—it’s clear that increased rigid dietary control will lead to failure, in the form of compulsive eating and/or feelings of guilt and shame.
The Limits of Flexible Dieting
Alongside the definition of rigid control exists the concept of flexible control. This has been defined as:
“A balanced approach to eating characterized by conscious and intentional food choices, monitoring portion sizes, eating to satisfaction, and compensating by eating more or less when needed.”
Sounds pretty good, right?
Flexible restraint has been associated with lower levels of disordered eating, psychological distress, and higher levels of self-regulation[4, 5].
The ability to choose foods you enjoy, adjust plans as your day progresses, and remove the need to “ban” or “forbid” something from your diet increases flexibility and adherence to the long-term goal.
This has been found to reduce the effect of food cravings and removes that “all-or-nothing approach” and the feeling of failure should plans go awry.
Unfortunately, flexible control also has its limitations.
Several studies have found that both rigid and flexible control are usually positively correlated with each other, as they both demand cognitive restraint [6]. This dietary restraint—whether flexible or rigid—still requires self-awareness and self-monitoring, which inflict cognitive demands on the individual. It still makes dieting an arduous process.
The demands of cognitive restraint are why flexible control hasn’t always been linked to positive health outcomes or well-being.
In promoting flexibility—perhaps through the adherence to specific macronutrient-based targets—these types of diets may inadvertently encourage rigid dieting practices, after all.
People, again, follow a rule, lose weight, experience a slight mishap, believe everything has been ruined, and end up quitting. While flexible control may have benefits for some, it’s clear it doesn’t work for everyone.
Is There Another Way?
Fortunately, there appears to be a middle ground—a Middle Way, if you will:
Eating Skills.
Eating skills, a core component of Food Body Self®, promote a “continuum-based thinking” approach, allow for harmful thoughts and feelings, and encourage a “yes and no” attitude toward food. They can always be carried around with you, whatever the situation and however you’re feeling. They always exist.
Eating skills don’t require you to be “on plan,” don’t need you to always be “motivated,” and don’t want you to ban items from your diet.
Eating skills promote a better body image, increase subjective well-being, and, most importantly, remove the cycle of restriction and overindulging.
While eating skills require practice, they allow individuals to engage in true hunger signals, recognise fullness cues, and ascertain when emotions are driving their decision-making.
Essentially, eating skills beat the need for rigid or flexible dietary control.
What are some of these eating skills?
Get to Know Your Hunger Signals
Many dieters have spent so long adhering to rigid dieting rules that they can’t distinguish between whether they’re truly hungry or simply bored and/or feeling emotional. They’ve always eaten when they’re not hungry and forbid themselves from eating when they are. They possess little regulation over when to eat and when not to.
Instead, it’s time to practice the skill of recognizing when you’re truly hungry.
Running through a series of questions to ascertain whether it’s hunger or simply a craving surfacing will enable you to work out whether to eat or not.
Do I feel a hollow feeling in my stomach?
Am I hungry for a balanced (protein, carbs, and fat) meal?
Has my hunger built up over time?
Will eating this make me feel better or worse?
True hunger is generally “body-driven” as opposed to “head-driven.”
A rumbling stomach, poor concentration, or feeling nauseous are all indicators you’re hungry, compared to a craving which is generally motivated by thoughts, feelings, and external factors (e.g., the sight or smell of food).
When you can recognize when you’re truly hungry, it doesn’t matter what or when you eat. You’ll know what foods to consume, how much to eat, and don’t have to wait until a rule tells you to do so.
Eat Mindfully
Individuals are so consumed with adhering to a diet plan that they have little regard for the taste, texture, and satisfaction to be had from a meal. They race through mealtimes, devouring food they’ve missed out on because they’re ravenous from overly restricting earlier in the day or week.
Additionally, when we consume hyper-palatable foods, flavor enjoyment often increases past satiety. Which means we end up eating more than we need.
The process of eating slowly while paying attention to the sensations of eating, therefore, gives you a chance to notice when you’re full, savor your food, and, when eating hyper-palatable foods, quell your cravings for them.
Implementing such a simple action at each mealtime that doesn’t forbid certain foods but increases fullness will promote an enjoyable yet unrestrained outlook on food.
Recognize Your Fullness Cues
Rigid dieting rules mean dieters are rarely in tune with how full they feel while eating. Increased food preoccupation and skewed contentment cues mean they continue eating even after past the point of satisfaction. Their self-imposed rules mean they’re desperate to keep eating for fear of missing out later.
Instead, it’s time to stop eating when you feel satisfied, as opposed to when you feel full or overfull.
Not only will this lead to improved appetite regulation, increase body awareness, and build a tolerance for slight discomfort, but will enhance the enjoyment of a meal.
Learning what “satisfied” feels like will take time. It will require you to pay close attention to your body throughout a meal and how you feel.
What does your stomach feel like?
How does your body feel?
Do you feel heavy or light?
If you were to stop eating now, would you feel satisfied?
Over time, you’ll gather useful information about your body and what foods leave you satiated, and which leave you feeling hungry.
Limit Distractions
Watching TV, scrolling through Twitter, or even reading can act as a distraction that impairs memory formation of the food we’ve consumed.
This, subsequently, reduces our expectation of feeling full, leading to greater consumption.
It’s why failing to remember what we eat will not only lead to overeating during the meal but more over the next few hours as well.
Without a reminder of what we’ve eaten – through physiological and psychological processes – we have little way of regulating our future food consumption.
Whenever you’re eating, it’s time to put away your phone and switch off the TV.
When you’re eating, eating is the only activity you’re engaged in.
Does this mean you should never eat in front of the TV or while having a conversation again? No, of course not. It’s not realistic to eliminate distractions 100% of the time. However, the more you can focus on your meal itself, and the more often you can limit distractions as you’re building this skill, the more benefits you’ll experience.
Placing your spotlight of attention on your food will enhance the enjoyment of the meal and allow you to focus specifically on what—and how much—you’re consuming.
Sometimes You Say “Yes,” Sometimes You Say “No”
Dieters are so constrained by the rules they’re following, they never feel as if they can say “yes.” They turn down food at social events, miss out on special occasions, and are constantly influenced by the guidelines of the particular diet they’re following.
Similarly, when they – inevitably – fail, they then say “yes” to everything. They limit the ability to stay restrained because they fall for that all-or-nothing approach.
The eating skills mantra goes:
Sometimes you say “yes,” sometimes you say “no.”
This will depend on the situation, how much you value the decision, and the potential satisfaction you’ll gain from the meal.
You may say “yes” to a particular food or drink while out celebrating an anniversary with your partner, but feel comfortable saying “no” when the office has ordered pizza for lunch on a random Thursday afternoon.
Permitting yourself to consume foods at certain times may feel like you’re losing control, but it’s the rigid rules you were following beforehand that gave you little control in the first place.
Alongside eating mindfully and paying attention to your fullness signals, you’ll begin to feel more in control by ascertaining when you truly want something. You’ll remove that ever-present fear of missing out because you can now evaluate when something really matters and when it doesn’t.
Surf The Urge
Many dieters are controlled by their emotions and the thoughts running deep inside their heads. They feel angry, so they eat cheesecake. They feel sad, so they have a glass of wine.
Most of us are living in a state of cognitive fusion, meaning we buy into what our thoughts tell us and permit them to direct our actions.
We can change this, however. Just like a surfer rides the waves in the ocean, we’re similarly able to “surf” the urges we experience.
This technique, called “Surfing The Urge,” is a valuable skill in practicing acceptance of our thoughts and cravings and still staying on track when faced with temptations [7].
In acknowledging and observing the thoughts we have (“I’m currently having the urge for a packet of chips/crisps”) and being open to it (“It’s perfectly acceptable to experience this urge”), we’re able to let these impulses appear and eventually fade away (“I no longer have a craving for that packet of chips/crisps”).
This act of mindfulness has consistently been found to help change self-destructive behaviors. No longer are you waiting to be told to eat something specific or to eat at a particular time, but you recognize when you’re eating because you’re emotional and when you need to eat because you’re hungry.
Eating skills are a central component of Food Body Self because they build up your sense of self-trust and control around food. Rather than rigid OR flexible diet rules, when you practice eating skills, you’re less likely to experience unplanned or compulsive eating—which is important whether or not you want to lose weight.
So if you want to say goodbye to the guilt, the shame, and the roller coaster of restriction and overindulgence that goes hand-in-hand with dieting, ditch your diet and start cultivating eating skills instead.
References
[1] Timko, C. A., & Perone, J. (2005). Rigid and flexible control of eating behavior in a college population. Eating Behaviors, 6(2), 119–125
[2] Byrne, S.M., Cooper, Z., & Fairburn, C.G. (2004). Psychological predictors of weight regain in obesity. Behaviour Research and Therapy, 42(11), 1341-1356
[3] Westenhoefer, J., Engel, D., Holst, C., Lorenz, J., Peacock, M., Stubbs, J., Whybrow, S., & Raats, M. (2013). Cognitive and weight-related correlates of flexible and rigid restrained eating behaviour. Eating Behaviors. 14, 69–72.
[4] Westenhoefer, J.; Stunkard, A.J.; Pudel, V. (1999). Validation of the flexible and rigid control dimensions of dietary restraint. International Journal of Eating Disorder. 26, 53–64
[5] Teixeira, P.J., Silva, M.N., Coutinho, S.R., Palmeira, A.L., Mata, J., Vieira, P.N., Carraça, E.V., Santos, T.C., Sardinha, L.B. (2010). Mediators of weight loss and weight loss maintenance in middle-aged women. Obesity. 18(4):725-35.
[6] Westenhoefer, J., Engel, D., Holst, C., Lorenz, J., Peacock, M., Stubbs, J., Whybrow, S., & Raats, M. (2013). Cognitive and weight-related correlates of flexible and rigid restrained eating behaviour. Eating Behaviors. 14, 69–72.
[7] Singh, Nirbhay & Lancioni, Giulio & Karazsia, Bryan & Myers, Rachel & Kim, Eunjin & Chan, Jeffrey & Jackman, Monica & McPherson, Carrie & Janson, Melissa. (2018). Surfing the Urge: An Informal Mindfulness Practice for the Self-Management of Aggression by Adolescents with Autism Spectrum Disorder. Journal of Contextual Behavioral Science. 12.